Review - Mud Vein by Tarryn Fisher

Title: Mud Vein

Author: Tarryn Fisher

Source: Amazon

Buy Link : Amazon

 

Synopsis:

When reclusive novelist Senna Richards wakes up on her thirty-third birthday, everything has changed. Caged behind an electrical fence, locked in a house in the middle of the snow, Senna is left to decode the clues to find out why she was taken. If she wants her freedom, she has to take a close look at her past. But, her past has a heartbeat…and her kidnapper is nowhere to be found. With her survival hanging by a thread, Senna soon realizes this is a game. A dangerous one. Only the truth can set her free.

MY REVIEW

Toss and Turn. Wake up with Mud Vein eyes, puffy and swollen. Make Coffee. Words. Typed. Erased. REPEAT. REPEAT. Bang head against keyboard. FUCK THIS SHIT. Storm away and grab some more coffee. Buy stock in Starbucks. Yell at my friends for making read this. TYPE MORE WORDS THAT I WILL JUST ERASE.

This review will be so different than any other review I have written. Since this book was raw and real, I want to be raw and real.

Before I can explain to you how deeply this book changed me, I must take you back. So lets go way back to when I was 18.

I graduated high school and met this amazing older man. I was 18 he was 27. I was just starting my life, he had already lived his. I was scared and I was all he wanted. We had babies and got married and life was real. REAL. 12 years have pasted and marriage is HARD. Some day's it seems easier to just walk away then to stay and try to make it work. Was this what my life was going to always be like? My husband is an amazing father, but I was 18 when I met him and I am 31 now. I have grown, I am no longer a girl, but a women. CHANGE. It happens, but not when you set in your ways and have already had a whole life. In the past week I have questioned my sanity and asked myself if I love my husband or if I am just comfortable with him.

Then. THEN I READ THIS.

"What's the difference" I asked him. " Between the love of your life, and your soul mate?"
"One is a choice, and one is not."

My life was changed the moment I read that. My view on my marriage, on my parents marriage, on MY WHOLE FUCKING 31 YEARS OF LIFE has been altered. I didn't chose my husband, I didn't have a say in loving him. There is a red string that connects me to him and until this very moment, I didn't know that. He is mine and I am his whether we like it or not.

"Love sticks, and it stays and it brave the bullshit"

Can a book save a marriage? FUCK NO. The people in that marriage have to save it.
Can a book change a person and make them see things clear? HELL YES. My eyes are open and my mind is clear. DOUBTS are gone and LOVE remains. That right there is what will save a marriage.


"Truth is for the mind," he says. "Lies are for the heart. So let's just keep lying." I kiss the man I lie to. He kisses me with truth. I am set free.

Can you feel your heart changing? Can you feel your soul reaching around the words and absorbing them? I hate it. I don't want to feel the way I do about this book. I want to go back and not read it. BUT I CAN NEVER GO BACK. This book has been etched in to my mind, my soul, my heart and it will never leave me.

You will feel me in the fall backwards

I can't even call the words in this book writing. THEY ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT. This book is poetry, its magical, it's overwhelming and gut wrenching. IT IS EVERYTHING

I want to have Tarryn Fishers words inked on my skin for eternity. I want to have them on me so when those doubts creep up, I just have to feel the words on my skin and push them away.

My mind, my soul, my heart and my sanity belong to Tarryn Fisher.